WHY IS BARRON TRUMP SO?………..

For The First Time In Almost 40 Years, We Have A Presidents Very Young Son, You Know Like A Lil President Mini-Me In Waiting. And That Would Be None Other Than A Young Barron Trump, Who Is Without A Doubt Thee Most Disinterested, Uninvolved, Unfazed By The Moment, Apathetically Coolest Person Ever In The Presidential Lineage!

Yes Obama Was & Still Is Cool, But Barron Is Most Definitely Another Kind Of Cool, He’s D*mn Near Ice! One Could Say There’s Something Aloof About This Boy, You Know Kinda Different, Or Maybe He Just Might Be Plain Old Shy & Quiet. Maybe.

Before I Go Further, Please Know That I Have To Be Careful As To What I Say , Cause He Is After All The President’s Son, And They Just Might Come Get Me! Y’all See What Happened To That SNL Writer Katie Rich? They Marched Her Poor Little White Azz Right Out The Door! Straight To Thee Unemployment Line!

She Couldn’t Even Play The Race Card!

So There Ain’t Gonna Be No Story Bout Me Poppin Up Missing Or Dying In An Elevator With Percocet’s In My Pocket! Or My Car Losing Control & Hitting A Tree & Blowing Up!

No Sir!  Y’all Ain’t Gonna Illuminati Me!

So I’ll Tread Lightly But It Still Needs To Be Addressed!

I Know That Many Of You Remember The Images Of A Sullen Barron At The Podium The Night His Father Donald Trump Won The Presidency. For Most Of Us That Would’ve Been An Awesome Moment At 13, 20, 40 Or Any Age But Barron Looked About As Interested As Nicky Minaj At A Remy Ma Concert! ( Front Row )

Whats The Deal With This Cool Kid?

WHY IS BARRON TRUMP…..

So Quiet?
So Uninvolved?
So Unfazed By It All?

Here Are Some Theories That May Help Us All Understand…….

“The Mystery Of Barron”!

1. (The Money ) Could It Be When You’re 13 And Worth Millions You’ve Seen It All & Done It All?

2. ( The Good Sh*t! ) Maybe…….Maybe It’s Just Good! Good! Medication?

3. ( Clogged Pipes ) Could It Be He’s Constipated & Has To Take A Dump? But Now That He’s Presidential He’s Too Embarrassed To Take That Presidential Dump In Public?

4. ( The Aliens ) Maybe He Had That Talk With The C.I.A & They’ve Showed Him The Aliens?

5. ( Tighty Whiteys ) You Know It’s Possible That Momma Melly Might’ve Bought Him Some Drawers That Are Toooo Tight!?

6. (Quiet By Default ) Maybe His Father Talks Too Much & Mathematically He Has To Equal That Out By Being Qiuet?

7. ( The Fart Theory ) Has Anybody Stopped To Think? Maybe He Just Farted & He Has To Stand There Look Cool & Play It Off So Nobody Thinks He Did It?

Whatever It Is ( Personally I Think It’s The Fart Theory ) This Guy Is Just Too Quiet! And We All Know What That Means Right? It Means…… Well I Really Wanna Tell You All What I Think It Means But If I Tell Y’all…….

The Truth Is I’ll Probably End Up Like This!

Abe Finklestein
Sports News & Humor