RUMOR HAS IT!….. “THE PHILLY EDITION”

RUMOR HAS IT…
​It’s time for another installment (this is actually the first installment) yes another installment of RUMOR HAS IT…
​Rumor has it that the Philadelphia Eagles want to trade up and draft Oregon’s quarterback Marcus Mariota. Well fact has it, that the person who started this rumor is a moron. The Eagles would have to give up their entire draft and Lesean McCoy in a trade to move up in the draft. Barney Rubble aka Chip Kelly isn’t that dumb…or is he? Maybe the guy who started this rumor is the genius and the one questioning him is the moron. I’m the one questioning him. I’m the moron?
​Rumor has it that the Sixers are looking to move Michael Carter-Williams aka MCW. Fact has it that the rumor was confirmed on the 2015 trade deadline. Rumor has it on why he was traded and it’s partially related to Tyrone Hill. The Sixers have a long history of being an ugly team. Tyrone Hill, Dikembe Mutombo, Andre Iguodala, and now we can include the aforementioned MCW and other current players like Nerlens Noel. It’s been years since the Sixers have sold out their arena, the last time being when Allen Iverson was in the lineup. A.I. was always someone women thought to be attractive. Coincidence? Yeah, but so what. My theory still holds. So the GM of the Sixers moved the frog looking MCW so the Sixers can be attractive again and finally sell tickets.

​Rumor has it that the Phillies are looking to trade Cole Hamels. GM Rubin Amaro aka Ruin Tomorrow, a nickname he earned by being terrible at his job and voted the worse GM in the history of every sport ever, even pee wee baseball. Thankfully for the Phillies fans it doesn’t matter if Hamels is traded or not because the Phillies will suck for years to come regardless thanks to Ruin Tomorrow and his imbecilic moves and trades.

​Rumor has it that the Flyers are…It’s hockey so no one gives a damn. I’m not writing about a sport that barely gets ESPN highlights. Rumor has it people stopped reading once they saw I’m writing about hockey.
​And there it is folks The 1st edition of RUMOR HAS IT

ADAYUS KNIGHT

sports humour