DID MARK SANCHEZ GIVE JOHN ELWAY A CHARMS BLOW POP?

MARK SANCHEZ MUST HAVE A SERIOUS STASH OF CHARMS BLOW POPS! OR MAYBE THE FOOTBALL GODS JUST LIKE HIM A WHOLE LOT! Either way, once again he lands the most Cushy of Cushy Jobs in Denver as a QB.

Denver acquired Mark Sanchez from the Eagles for a 2017 conditional seventh-round draft pick on Friday, a team source told NFL Media Insider Ian Rapoport.  Broncos general manager John Elway later confirmed the move via tweet with the typical blah blah blah crap that makes you think that an NFL Team, much less one that just won The Superbowl would actually be excited to get Mark Sanchez.  “The Picture of Mediocrity”

Sanchez, who the Eagles signed to a three-year contract in 2014, will save the Eagles $4.5 million of salary cap space. He became expendable when the team re-signed starter Sam Bradford to a two-year, $36 million contract and then added backup Chase Daniel through free agency on a three-year, $21 million contract. The Eagles are expected to add a third quarterback through the 2016 NFL Draft.

The Broncos lost both of their quarterbacks from last year’s Super Bowl champions when future Hall of Famer Peyton Manning announced his retirement and Brock Osweiler signed as a free agent with the Houston Texans.

Ok that’s the numbers & all that techno stuff, now heres my two cents!  ( I mean c’mon! that’s why y’all come to this site, to hear what Ya Boy Abe has to say! )  And hear it is!   Mark Sanchez is giving out Charms Blow Pops! He gave one to the whole staff of Denver! Especially Elway, he probably gave him a Super Blow Pop!

Mark Sanchez listened to Boyz to Men 90’s classic “Bended Knee” and then got down on Bended Knees and went into Elway’s Office and gave out a huge amount of Blow Pops!  All Flavors even Raspberry!

There’s no other way to explain it,  people just  don’t sit around and have meetings about bringing Mark Sanchez to their team, so trust me folks either he gave out Blow Pops or he Bended it like Beckham!  He did one of the two, you don’t just get a job like that,  being  “The Picture of Mediocrity”.  Unless somebody with Big Balls & even Bigger Blow Pops,  pushes that trade!

Btw, Howie Roseman is a Freakin Genius! Or The World’s Greatest Conman! take your pick.

So there it is everybody, Mark Sanchez can now get down wit da Team cause he Swallows! — I mean um…… Mark Sanchez is now a Denver Bronco, Congratulations!……..Slurp!!

Abe Finklestein
Sports Humour