( UNASSOCIATED PRESS ) MOMENTS AFTER THE GUILTY VERDICT WAS READ AARON HERNANANDEZ MOUTHED WHAT WAS THOUGHT TO Be the words” be strong ” to his fiancée but what he really said was ” By any means necessary”! Yes folks Aaron Hernandez is trying to be the next Malcolm X! He didn’t just strike that ” I’m a put my fingers to my chin and look intelligent” pose for nothing. Our sources ( a fat middle aged woman who works in the courthouse cafeteria who for some reason smells like Mexican cat litter sex ) gave us an interview outback in front of the dumpster and says she was told by a security guard that Aaron was overheard quoting the Q’oran and screaming out that Allah would get him through.

But another prisoner said Aaron was screaming because he couldn’t move his bowels. ( jailhouse food will do that to you ) His cell mate John “The Big Gay” Stewart has said that Aaron has been making Bean Pie chee chee’s ( prison slang for noodles made in the same sink you wash your azz in ) and reciting Malcolm X speeches way into the wee hours until someone finally says ” yo man shut da f*#k up wit dat bullsh*t dog you in hear for murder”!

But that won’t stop Aaron as he has placed an order on his weekly commissary for a Beenie and a prayer mat and he is asking to be referred to as Malcolm Hernandez. Here is one of Aaron’s Speeches ” We as a people have been bestowed in democracy and as messengers of Allah we must………….. ( This speech was interrupted by Aaron’s cell mate having to take a dump) sorry! But you know that picture where Aaron’s fingers are to his chin? Yea we bet those same fingers are now covering his nose.

abefinklestein
sports humour
Like this:
Like Loading...